So I’ve once again not stopped since Easter – it’s been a bit of a year so far! However a last minute chance to go to Bulgaria for a week in a self-catered apartment was too good to pass up, so I put the laptop down and jetted off! We had such a lovely time exploring the local historical port towns, resting, reading (I read 2 books!), cocktails, discovering Bulgarian food (delicious!) and hiding in the aircon while temperatures soared to 35 in the middle of the day! We saw sunrises, beaches, museums; it was fantastic. I felt so relaxed as soon as we landed. While I was ready for my own bed and shower, I was sad to leave and I will absolutely return!

Daughter home for the summer and has been since May, and it’s great to see her, though my bathroom has been overrun with hair stuff (seriously, I can’t move for curl creams and gels and mousse!) and I’m struggling a bit with financially supporting us both, but it’s lovely to have her here. I miss her when she’s away. She’s such a lovely girl, I’m so proud of her.

Aside from the house guest and the holiday, I’ve also had some good news health-wise; my latest bloods for the diabetes showed that I’m now down to a pre-diabetic level, which is excellent. Cutting out all added sugar, lowering carbohydrate portions, and getting more protein and veggies has helped, but I suspect the medication is doing a lot of the heavy lifting! I’ll take it, though, it’s great that my body isn’t suffering so much now.

We’re staring down another heatwave (Wales got to 36 degrees on the day we left for Bulgaria, where it was 29 there!) so while it won’t be that hot, it will be a longer patch of late 20s and early 30s for a week or so. Never been so grateful for Past-Me for using some of my wages to get an aircon unit last year, it’s been invaluable this year. It’s upstairs to cool the bedroom, so there’s always a cooler room we can hide in when the late afternoon heat hits.

Mum stuff is continuing though I’m much, much more capable of handling her bullshit these days. I just disengage and feel no guilt doing so, which is a huge improvement. We had a call after the holiday, which was fine – I think she got more out of it than I did, but seeing her was… nice? I sent her a card for her birthday which she was really happy about, so that felt nice. Her behaviour is always going to be a problem – she’s too stubbornly fixed on believing that her issues are everyone else’s fault and not hers, and she won’t look at them now – so it’s a case of accepting that about her, and having a more distant relationship to keep myself protected from that these days. She mourns the closeness we once had, and in a way so do I, though I know now it was toxic and what I actually miss is the relationship I thought I had, not the reality of what it was.

Right, I’ll leave it there for now. I’ll try to write more regularly moving forward!

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