Well what a month! Daughter came home early from uni at the beginning of the month, and we’ve been on the go since then! We had a wonderful festive period, including hotel stays, spas, celebrations, long car rides to spend Christmas with my sister, even LONGER car rides home (more than double the time it took to get there!) but everything has been chilled and relaxed. Even managed to squeeze the odd day in with my partner when daughter was busy with her local friends! It’s been full of joy, and a stark contrast to how I was last year when I felt responsible for everyone, chaotic, and stressed.

Dinner was a colaborative, chilled, peaceful affair (well planned out the day before, including what was going where and when for the oven!) and everyone had a great time.

I’ve missed my partner terribly, and when the snow and ice passes and it’s safe to drive again, am looking forward to spending some quality time resting there. Daughter left today so the house is quiet – I’ve some cleaning, laundry, bedding changes, and vacuuming to do but that can wait til tomorrow. For now, am battling feeling sleepy but can’t succumb or I’ll be awake at 3am.

Stuff with Mum is going… okay. The good news is that I’m holding myself firm on my boundaries and it’s remarkably easy to do; I feel I’ve a good grasp of why a boundary is there, and therefore it’s easier to hold. The less good news is, predictably, that she has made zero progress in the few years we’ve been no contact, and still attempts to ride roughshod over any line in the sand I have. However while I’m finding it easy to tell her it’s unacceptable – and have her listen to me – I’m keeping a really close eye on how much emotional resilience it’s taking, and if that line is crossed I’m quite happy to return to low or no contact again; a fact I suspect she’s poignantly aware of, hence the listening and backing off she’s doing. All in all it’s nice to be back in touch – there are things I’ve missed about having a relationship with her – but things are definitely different this time. I feel a lot more peaceful and calm with it all, and it’s not sapping my energy.

That’s it for now. 2026 started well and I’m tired but happy. Lots of rest this month I think, December has been brutal! Fun, amazing, joyful, but full-on. Time for books and sleeps and resting now! x